Red Herrings and White Elephants Read online

  RED

  HERRINGS

  AND

  WHITE

  ELEPHANTS

  The Origins of the Phrases

  We Use Everyday

  ALBERT JACK

  With Illustrations by Ama Page

  This book is dedicated to the memory of

  Albert Victor Childs (1916–1998)

  INTRODUCTION

  In the course of a day, we all use many examples of what is known as an idiom. Idioms are words and phrases which those of us with a native English tongue take for granted, as we have grown up to recognise their meaning. That is despite the words being used having absolutely nothing to do with the context of a conversation we are having.

  For example, if I explained I am writing this preface ‘off the cuff’, you would immediately recognise it as an unprepared piece being written in one take (which, by the way, it is). But why do I call that ‘off the cuff’ when it has nothing to do with my cuffs, much less being either on or off them?

  If I suggest everything in this book is absolutely true, I can emphasis that statement by insisting every word in here is ‘straight from the horse’s mouth’. Again, we all know that means it has come directly from the source of information and is therefore reliable. But I haven’t got a horse. I have never spoken to one and unless I can find one that wins more often, even when I hedge my bets, then I might have nothing to do with any of the beasts again.

  These phrases appear in conversation all over the English-speaking world every minute of the day and we take them for granted. Have you ever heard someone say they had a bone to pick with you or they could smell a rat? Have you wondered what on earth they were talking about? No, probably not, because we all grow up knowing what these phrases refer to, but, if you were overheard by anyone learning our beautiful language, they’d think we were all mad.

  However, have you ever wondered where those phrases come from in the first place and why we use them? I did, when I was sitting in a pub with a friend, who was feeling a little groggy and under the weather, as he had been out painting the town red the previous night. I suggested a hair of the dog was in order and the bar-person, who was an English student from Colombia, and a very good one at that, thought we were crazy. She told us dogs weren’t allowed in the pub. How we all laughed.

  It was wintertime, and cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey, so cold, in fact, I believe it was snowing in the ladies. So we sat by the fire, hair of the dog in hand, and started wondering where those sayings originated and why they are so natural to use. The pub’s guv’nor eventually fetched us up a square meal, but we’d been there a while and before we all reached the end of our tethers I decided to leave for home. It was raining cats and dogs outside, so I bit the bullet and made my way through the cold and started researching these little phrases. Within minutes I had discovered that many of them do have traceable origins and some even emerge from a particular event in history. Some are unbelievable but, by and large, many make immediate sense. Some have more than one suggested origin, in which case, I have chosen the source that had the best supporting evidence. Therefore, I can assure the reader, there is only one cock and bull story among them.

  It took months of painstaking research, working mainly between the hours of closing time and opening time, before I finally had it in the bag and the fruit of that labour is now in your hand. I know there are many missing idioms (thousands of the rascals, in fact), but we deliberately selected only the best-known sayings with interesting origins. The idea was not to create a definitive dictionary of well-known phrases, but to choose the ones we could have some fun with and those that you, the reader who sent a shilling in my direction, would enjoy.

  Thanks to my brilliant illustrator, Ama Page, there are also some top-notch cartoons to help you along the way.

  But there is another benefit to reading this book. Everybody loves trivia, but nobody likes a smart Alec. So, the next time you are caught in a corner with somebody talking a load of old codswallop, tell them where that phrase comes from and then start reciting a few of the other shaggy dog tales from this collection. That should get rid of them for you.

  CONTENTS

  Introduction

  1 Nautical

  2 Military

  3 Literature

  4 Languages

  5 The Ancients: Greeks and Romans

  6 Sport

  7 Work and trade

  8 The Bible

  9 People and Places

  10 Politics

  11 The Law

  12 Music,Theatre and Performance

  13 The USA

  14 Food and Drink

  15 Hunting

  16 Simple Phrases, Simple Origins

  17 Miscellaneous

  Searchable Terms to Phrases

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  Copyright

  About the Publisher

  1: NAUTICAL

  To be Taken Aback suggests someone has been taken truly by surprise and stopped in their tracks. ‘Aback’ is the nautical term for sudden wind change, in which the sails flatten against the mast. In some cases, out on the high seas, tall square-rigged ships may not only be slowed down by a sudden wind change, but also driven backwards by strong gusts. The phrase used in such circumstances is ‘taken aback’.

  To Have Someone Over A Barrel means that somebody is totally at the mercy of third parties and unable to have any influence over the circumstances surrounding them. In medieval Britain it was standard practice to drape a drowning, or drowned, person face down over a large barrel to try and clear their lungs. As the victim was usually unconscious it was obvious they were totally reliant upon third parties and whatever action they took would determine their fate. Not really an ideal situation to be in for many reasons–especially in the Navy.

  The Bitter End is the absolute end. This phrase has its origins at sea and is nothing to do with taste. On the sailing ships of past centuries, the anchor was fixed to the deck by solid bollards made of iron and wood known as ‘bitts’. Coloured rags were tied to the rope near the deck end and once they were revealed crewmates knew the anchor could not be let out much further. The rope between the anchor and rag was known as the bitt end or the bitter end. To be at the ‘bitter end’ meant there was no rope left and the water was too deep to set the anchor.

  If something Goes By The Board it means it is cast aside, lost in the events. On the old wooden tall ships the ‘board’ was the side of the boat. Anything falling off a ship and lost forever was regarded as gone past the board, or ‘by the board’. By And Large is a phrase we use as a substitute for ‘broadly speaking’ or dealing with a subject in general terms rather than in a detailed way. The phrase is a nautical one and dates back to day when ships relied on the wind in their sails. Sailing ‘by’ means to steer a ship very close to the line of the wind, and sailing ‘large’ means the wind is on the quarter. This technique made it easier for helmsmen to keep a ship on course during changing winds and in difficult conditions but not in a particularly accurate way, just generally in the right direction. Large ships were assessed on their ability to sail ‘by and large’. The phrase was a standard part of the nautical language by 1669 and in wider use by the turn of the following century.

  When you have Had Your Chips your luck has run out and you are close to failing altogether. Often this is thought to relate to gambling casinos and the gaming chips they use as stake money. This certainly does ring true and can illustrate a situation where a desperate gambler, trying to win back his losses, could be told, ‘You have had all your chips now.’ But there is an earlier suggestion. An old naval story indicates workers in a dockyard were allowe
d to take home off-cuts of timber, known as chips, as a perk of the job. It was not uncommon for some men to fall out of favour with the foreman, perhaps for trying to take too many, and to have this privilege removed. In which cases they were told they had ‘had all their chips’.

  To Cut And Run describes pulling rapidly out of a difficult situation and escaping without disadvantage. The phrase was first recorded in 1704 and has a nautical meaning. Hauling a heavy anchor was a difficult task and took many men a considerable time to both free it and raise it back into the sling. Ships coming under attack from the shoreline could suffer considerable damage before the anchor could be dislodged and raised, so it became standard practice to chop the hemp anchor line with an axe and to allow the ship to ‘run on the wind’. By 1861 the phrase to ‘cut and run’ was a standard naval expression.

  Dead In The Water means an idea or scheme has no momentum and no chance of success. This is a nautical expression, dating back to the days of the sailing ships. On a windless day, with nothing to propel the vessel, a boat sitting motionless in the sea was known as ‘dead in the water’, going nowhere.

  To be At A Loose End describes a time when we would normally be sitting around with nothing to do. We go back to the old tall ships to define this phrase. Any ship using sails would have thousands of ropes making up the rigging. Each of these lengths would need to be bound tight at both ends to prevent them from unravelling, which would be disastrous during a storm. When the ship’s captain found seamen sitting around with nothing to do, he would usually assign them mundane labour such as checking the rigging for loose ends, and re-binding them. Therefore, idle men would find usually themselves ‘at a loose end’.

  On The Fiddle has nothing at all to do with the previous saying. Instead it implies someone is involved in something not entirely within the rules, and perhaps gaining more than they should be. This is a nautical saying and associated directly with the square ship plate (see Square Meal). Those square plates had a raised rim (as did the tables), which prevented food falling off in high seas and these rims were called ‘fiddles’. Crew would become suspicious of a fellow sailor with so much food it piled against the rims and they became known as ‘on the fiddle’ (taking or being given more than they should).

  First Rate means something is the best available, near perfect or as good as you can get. From the time Henry VIII began organising the English Navy in the 16th century, war ships were rated on a scale of one to six (a grading that lasted more than 300 years). Then, as now, size mattered and the smallest ships were given a sixth rating, while the largest and best armed were regarded as first rate. Therefore, the best ships to command or crew were known as the ‘first rate’ vessels, a term that became synonymous with the best of anything.

  To Flog A Dead Horse is to waste time and energy on a situation that will clearly have a negative outcome. Far out to sea, the Horse Latitudes can be found 30 degrees either side of the Equator, where the subsiding dry air and high pressure results in weak winds. According to naval legend, the area was so called because the tall sail ships, relying on strong winds, always slowed considerably or even stalled altogether. Often it took months to pass through the Horse Latitudes, by which time sailors had worked off what was known as the ‘Dead Horse’–the advance wages they had received when signing on. As seamen were paid by the day, the slow passage was to their benefit and there was no incentive to expend much effort in the Horse Latitudes as they worked off their advance wages. Therefore this period of months in the painfully slow mid-ocean became known as ‘flogging the dead horse’.

  When somebody Passes With Flying Colours they have achieved something with distinction, or been successful in a difficult task. The earliest known reference dates back to 1706 and the English Navy, whose term for flag was ‘colours’. Victorious and sailing back into London, fleets would demonstrate their success at battle by keeping the battle flags high on the mast and word would soon spread that the Navy had passed by ‘with its colours flying’, a sure sign of victory.

  To feel Groggy means to feel generally run down and unwell, often as the result of drinking too much. In 1740 Admiral Vernon, the commander in chief of the West Indies, replaced the neat rum which was then issued to all sailors twice daily, with a watered-down version. The Admiral was a well-known figure and had the nickname ‘Old Grog’ because of his trademark Grogam coat (a rough mixture of mohair and silk). Thomas Trotter, a sailor on board the Berwick, wrote the following passage in 1781:

  A mighty bowl on deck he drew

  And filled it to the brink

  Such drank the Burford’s gallant crew

  And such the gods shall drink

  The sacred robe which Vernon wore

  Was drenched within the same

  And hence his virtues guard our shore

  And Grog drives its name

  According to The Guardian’s Notes & Queries, Series I, the unhappy sailors of the fleet soon began calling the new watered-down ration ‘Grog’ and as a natural progression drunk sailors were considered ‘groggy’.

  Making money Hand Over Fist alludes to the practice of making steady financial gain, and usually pretty quickly. Back in the 18th century the term was originally ‘hand over hand’ and was a nautical term meaning ‘to make fast and steady progress up a rope’. Later modified to ‘hand over fist’, alluding to a flat hand passing over the fist gripping the rope, the phrase widened to describe any steady progress in the forward direction, never backwards, such as a boat race. By the late 19th century the financial markets, where often the largest sums could be made out of industrial shipping, had adopted the expression.

  The expression to be Left High And Dry describes being stranded in a situation without support or resource. It’s quite simply a nautical phrase, in use from the early 1800s (around the time of the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805), and used to describe a ship left grounded and vulnerable as the tides goes out. A ship’s captain who had been left ‘high and dry’ could do nothing to resolve his situation until the tide returned and refloated his boat. In the meantime the ship was exposed and vulnerable.

  To be Put Through The Hoop means to be punished or chastised for a wrongdoing. This is a nautical phrase related to the ancient marine custom of ‘running the hoop’. The punishment comprised four or more convicted sailors being stripped to the waist, and having their left hands tied to an iron hoop. In the other hand each would hold a length of rope known as a nettle. The bosun would then hit one sailor with a cat o’ nine tales and he in turn would have to hit the man in front of him. Being put ‘through the ordeal of the hoop’ later became shortened to the phrase we know today. Originally, it was a form of horseplay when the ship was in calm waters, but as each blow landed the angry recipient would land a harder blow on the man in turn. As it went on the blows became harder, leading to its effectiveness more as a punishment rather than a game.

  Telling a person to Shake A Leg means encouraging them to get on with a task. In recent centuries the phrase was well used in public school dormitories, prisons and other institutions where people sleeping in communal rooms would be ordered out of bed at dawn every day. The origin of the saying dates back to the time when civilian women were first allowed on board a ship. At that time the bosun’s mate would traditionally rouse the sailors with the cry ‘Shake a leg or a purser’s stocking.’ When a stocking-clad female leg appeared the lady was allowed to stay in her bunk until the men were all up and departed. This was an obvious attempt to preserve her modesty while dressing, but it would seem fair to suggest that a lady on board a ship full of 18th-century sailors may not have had much modesty left worth preserving.

  When a person Splices The Mainbrace, they are celebrating the successful outcome of an event. The phrase is another dating back to the days of the tall ships that relied upon the wind in their sails. During heavy seas the bosun granted extra rum rations to the sailors who undertook the dangerous duty of climbing the highest rigging, known as the mainbrace. Such sailors we
re able to celebrate a little more than the others who were given more menial tasks to perform.

  Money For Old Rope is simple to explain. In days long gone, when the tall ships returned to their ports, some sailors were allowed to claim old rigging damaged during the voyage. Although of no use to the ships needing long undamaged lines for their sails, parts would still be in good condition and sought after by local traders. Sailors profited by selling it on and, as no effort was required on their part (it was regarded as a perk amongst senior shipmen), some jealousy occurred. The chosen few were criticised for making ‘money out of old rope’. These days estate agents have replaced favoured crewmen.

  When it is cold enough to Freeze The Balls Off A Brass Monkey, we really had better wrap up warm. But who ever heard of such a thing? Old nautical records provide the answer. The guns on 18th-century men-of-war ships needed gunpowder to fire them, and this was stored in a different part of the ship for safety reasons. Young boys, usually orphans, who were small enough to slip through tight spaces, carried this powder along tiny passages and galleys. Because of their agility the lads became known as ‘powder monkeys’ and by association the brass trays used to hold the cannonballs became known as the brass monkeys. These trays had 16 cannonball-sized indentations that would form the base of a cannonball pyramid. Brass was used because the balls would not stick to or rust on brass as they did with iron, but the drawback was that brass contracts much faster in cold weather than iron. This meant that on severely cold days the indentations holding the lower level of cannonballs would contract, spilling the pyramid over the deck, hence ‘cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey’.